What do Oprah, 60 Minutes, Wall Street Journal and USA Today have in common? They have all featured Rebecca Morgan's expertise! I'm thrilled to announce that Rebecca Morgan is coming all the way from the USA to Singapore to conduct 2 workshops with ST Training Solutions. Be sure to sign up early because the first 20 to register will receive one of Rebecca's books or audio-recordings FREE!
Here are the dates for your diary:

22 January: 'Time Management Triumphs:
Practical Ideas for Magical Results'
23 January: 'Calming Upset Customers:
How to stay effective during unpleasant situations':

In this article, Rebecca gives us some tips for calming upset customers.

General Philosophy

® Don't take upset customers' rantings and ravings personally. Don't get emotionally hooked. When you let him or her "push your buttons" you lose. When you respond emotionally - with anger, sarcasm, upset, tears - you can't respond rationally. He wants to upset you because he thinks you'll give him what he wants to get rid of him.

® Make it a game or challenge to see how many upset customers you can turn around. See if you can get him to be reasonable.

® Look for the "gifts" upset customers offer you. These gifts are what they can teach you about dealing with ugly human behaviour. The better you deal with them, the fewer upset people you'll have in your life. They'll see through your body language and composure that you are confident you can find a solution without getting rattled.

® Understand that obnoxious customers are often embarrassed because they made a mistake and want to blame it on you.

® Respond by being reasonable, firm, pleasant, mature, and professional to show them that you're going to do what you think is right no matter how obnoxious they get. They think that being rude is the only way to get action.

® Don't give away the store to shut her up. That rewards her behavior and teaches her - and others - that acting belligerently is the way to get what she wants.

® Remind yourself that this abusive person must really have problems if this is how he treats others. He doesn't respect himself so he doesn't show respect for others. He doesn't know what you know about how to get people to do what you want - happily.

Specific Behaviours

® Listen fully - don't interrupt. If you do, it will escalate her anger. Take notes; looking up often to maintain eye contact. Assume body language that shows you're interested and concerned.

® Have a respectful tone, even though you don't respect his behaviour. Have a calm but concerned voice tone. Don't get distracted.

® Remove the upset customer from the main customer area, if possible. She rants and raves to get attention and knows that many people will give her what she wants to shut her up quickly.

® Let him cool off when on the phone by saying that you need to research the situation and possible solutions, and ask if you may call him back. Then do so at the appointed time. He probably will have calmed down by the time you call him back.

® Talk about what you can do, not what you can't do. Put it positively. Don't talk about the "policy." This will anger her more.

® Use the "broken record" technique, firmly, yet politely, repeating what you can do for him.

® Ignore her impoliteness and cursing. She's really lashing out at your organisation, even though she may say "you're incompetent" via various phrasings. If you allow the cursing to offend you, you've lost your objectivity and control, and she's won. Edit her comments in your head so you can make sense of her words without getting upset. For example: "You're a fool. Why did you do this wrong? Who would ever hire an incompetent worker like you?" translates into "She's really upset. Something is wrong. What can I do to help set it right?"

An important concept to remember is that you won't please all people. You should do the best you can, but there are some customers your organisation can do better without. It is management's responsibility to determine if this customer is one that should be encouraged to utilise someone else's services.

Upset customers can be unnerving. But with the right attitude and techniques, many of these people can be turned into satisfied, loyal customers. It's not always easy, but it's worth it.

Find out more NOW about Rebecca's workshop with ST Training Solutions, 'Calming Upset Customers' and also 'Time Management Triumphs'. Be one of the first 20 to sign up to receive a book or audio recording from Rebecca.

Here I am with Heather Hansen (far right) and some lucky participants who won lucky draw prizes at Heather's first workshop with ST Training Solutions 'Speak up Successfully' on 5 October. One participant said, "Interesting tips, comfortable and non-intimidating learning environment. Heather and Shirley are great!" :-)

Heather will be conducting this workshop again on 11 December, so do find out more and sign up early.

In this article Heather gives some thoughts on the topic of word stress.

When I bring up the topic of word stress to a group of Singaporean professionals, I'm usually met by blank stares. Word stress plays a minimal role in Singapore English, but an enormous role in the intelligibility of your spoken English when speaking with native English speakers in the region.

Don't know what I'm talking about? Let's look at a simple example. The word calendar can be broken down into 3 syllables: cal-en-dar. Of these three syllables, one is stressed more than the others, meaning it is said louder, longer, at a higher pitch, and/or with a purer vowel sound. In this case, the stressed syllable is the first one: CAL-en-dar. Over time in Singapore, this word stress has changed to the second syllable, so it is common to hear it pronounced cal-EN-dar. This pronunciation has little resemblance to the standard one, and this is why native English speakers might have a really hard time making the connection.

There are many differences between Singapore English word stress and standard word stress. In this short article, I would just like to focus on one small piece in this puzzle: 2-syllable words. These words are so short it's surprising that a simple shift in word stress can make such a huge difference - but it does.

2-syllable nouns and adjectives

Most 2-syllablle nouns and adjectives have stress on the first syllable.
In Singapore however, this stress is often moved to the second syllable, or both syllables are given equal stress. Some words I often hear in Singapore are collEAGUE (instead of COLLeague) and purCHASE (instead of PURchase). This pattern of word stress is so ingrained in Singaporeans, many will fight me on this point until they are blue in the face (if we don't find a dictionary before then).

And it's not just Singaporeans! My husband, a non- Singaporean and non-native English speaker, came home the other day and told me he had to write up a few purCHASE orders. When I corrected his pronunciation, he completely resisted and declared that this time, I was definitely wrong! I asked him where he learned this word, and when he said, "From my collEAGUES!" I decided to give up.

2-syllable verbs

2-syllable nouns, when used as verbs, shift their stress to the second syllable.
The majority of nouns that also have a verb form (eg: progress, present, object, produce, record) will be stressed on the first syllable when used as a noun, and the second syllable when used as a verb. Take for example the word progress. Watch how the stress changes depending on how the word is used.

We are making great PROgress in this field. (noun) New technologies are helping us to proGRESS in this field. (verb)

Unfortunately for us, there are many exceptions to this rule. Some words will remain the same (keeping stress on the first syllable), such as answer, picture, travel, visit and several others.

Remember the old taxi booking recording? "Please do not hang up. We are proCESSing your booking now." According to our general rule, this pronunciation would make sense, but unfortunately, the word process is an exception. Listen carefully the next time you order your taxi. You'll notice that they now use the proper pronunciation, 'PROcessing.'

If you had never heard about word stress before, please don't get too stressed out! The good news is that non-native English speakers pay little attention to word stress when speaking English with each other. Ironically, it's only the native English speakers that get confused! If you find that native speakers are having trouble understanding you, pay special attention to how you are stressing your words. Sometimes it isn't what you say, but how you say it!

If you want to improve your language and pronunciation, sign up for the next run of Heather Hansen's workshop 'Speak up Successfully' on 11 December. Do register early though because numbers are strictly limited for this popular workshop.